How to Un-Love?
Everybody apparently teaches how to love, however, those novels, movies or theoretical lovers never teach you how to Un-Love! It is a tricky business, I tell you! So, first of all, one needs to figure out if the love they have been bragging about all this while, is the kind of love you want to cling on to or the one that comes like the calm before an apocalypse. The love of your life is the kind of love you’d intend to cling on to. However, the love of a lifetime always comes in a package of perfection that is toxic to own and shattering to let go. Let go! It restores peace and harmony in an otherwise jeopardized life!
Your whole life either goes, searching for that one true love that you never let go in the coming twenty five years possibly. However, that love of a lifetime is your one epic love that you’re stumped by in all this soul searching! It comes like the whiff of your favourite flavour of cheese that you should resist yourself from, in order to stay healthy, but end up consuming completely, because as a human being you are unable to get past that temptation! The love that consumes you, takes away a few precious months’ time, and leaves you with a baggage of a lifetime that contains guilt, a cringing agony and yet leaves a wry smile on your lips with the mere thought of it!
The love that teaches you the philosophy of differentiating between a true love, with a handful of imperfections from an epic love with a plethora of perfection that could only work in an alternate universe! It rips you apart, leaves your soul bare to the world’s cruelty, and exposes you, naked, before the massive upheaval of pretentious sympathy that only makes you more vulnerable. Nine out of ten times, it ends up devouring you from all worldly beliefs on the emotion called love.
Your one true love arrives exactly then! You’ll never know how. You’ll never expect. It won’t knock your door on a stormy night and ask for shelter. It’ll neither offer you his jacket on a cold winter night. It will be self-sustaining and a manifestation of contentment in itself. It will stare at you and let you cry your heart out, ‘coz it knows you need to empty the bad in order to completely fill in yourself with the best! It will not lend you a tissue, ‘coz it knows, you need to become strong enough to handle yourself, when no one’s around to support! It’ll seem most unlikely, but these are the types of love you’re looking for. Not the ones that hugs you, caresses your hair, kisses your forehead and makes lifetime promises to be there for you!
But, in order to love the love of your life, you need to un-love your love of a lifetime. How to do that? Well, a little heads up, YOU CAN’T! With time the latter forms a sediment at the bottom of your heart and slowly dissolves within itself to mix with the jell-o shot of your imploding love for the one true love of your life! You’ll live in a delusion of having “moved on” till may be a few years and yet a small notification alert from the latter, in your phone might skip a heartbeat. However, one fine day you’ll wake up and there won’t be that heart beat skip. You’ll feel a sudden emptiness, devoid a certain heaviness within yourself. You’ll feel free and devoid of every obligation you’ve felt till now. It’ll be bizarre ‘coz all this while the heaviness had almost become a part of your physiology.
But, somewhere from deep within you’ll know, you’ve finally learnt to un-love. The feeling will be ravishing in itself and you’ll finally be able to scroll past a number in your contact list without flinching or choking for that matter of fact.
You can’t un-love. But, when a love stronger than the former arrives, the existing love slowly wears off and evaporates, leaving a small mark of retention at the bottom of your heart, reminding you of its existence, so that, one fine day you can brag about it before the whole world!
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